Teenage years.

When I was 13 years old one day I was walking by the canal and on the other side of the canal I saw a horse rider and on it was a German soldier. That was for me the beginning of the war. I know in 1939 my Dad was called up for the service,but that did not click with me. After the Germans took over the Netherlands things changed. I hope throughthe blog Some memories will come back. Teenage years suppose to be fun. But I found out different.I was always afraid something would happen.And lot of it did. It was every night blackout. We had to be in the house before 8 o'clock p.m. I remember when I would go to my bedroom at night I would look under the bed if there was a firebomb.We heard that firebombs would fall on the roof of homes,so why would I look under the bed, I don't know. I was not smart enough I think. But when you are young your mind seems to go all directions. Times when they came to our house looking for my Dad our my older brother. By that time he was about 18, and hated the Germans for what they did to us. One year he helped with getting rid of all the milk from the farmers so the Germans could not use it.Finally he was picket up and put in jail. How awful that must have been for my parents. Most people that where picket up went to Germany and who knows what then.Finally they let him go and I still see my Mom running down the street when a neighbor told her your son is coming home. She had her apron on and slippers and she ran.Now I have children I know what it mend to her.The one thing I want to have come across is The worry we always had. For 5 years, my teen years. What the years did to my body.Also to my husband. He had polio after the war from complications of not having enough food.We both had our problems, but we would understand one a other. We lived it.I think this is why we where so close. People here do not understand what war is. Yes we read but you do not feel it. I remember when I worked in the cancer center and we would have a patient that has been in the war and he would find out that I was there to, they would open up. Tell me about there problems and how he felt. They said they never talked about it with their family because they do not understand. It is the same if you lose a partner and people say they understand. They do not unless they have been there. One thing I always understand there is never enough love that you can give to your family, friends our neighbors. And hold on to it, it will give you strength. I hope I do not rehash everything over and over,but I have learned a lot in my life and hope to pass a little on.